Cold-Cocking As A Means of Progress (A Call To Arms)

14 Jul

The annual exodus from Grahamstown is in full swing as I sit down to write this. Those returning from performing or watching new (Fresh! Vibrant! Yay us!) theatre at The National Arts Festival are flooding the internet with Facebook updates and Tweets about the genius work they saw, the best of times they had, the glory of our unified nation and the general nonsense that comes with that sort of back-slapping, artsy-fartsy, communal experience. People are vomiting sayings like, “It changed my life,” and “It reminded me of how great our country and our theater has become.” The offence these people commit are not that they believe what they say, but that they say it so freely. Innocent as it may be to openly volunteer inane enthusiasm for what is clearly not as glorious as the bouncy, wide-eyed idiots would want you to believe, it is endemic of a larger problem that faces our fragile little artistic community: the ruling class of this community are so used to saying whatever comes into their sub-fame contaminated minds that the idea of anyone telling them to shut up will be tantamount to a serf’s betrayal of a royal’s trust in times long forgotten (by general society.)

Allow me to offer an example that may clarify my rant: there is an old actor who lives in Cape Town and remains a fixture on the stage and on television. He is a respected, beloved old codger who carries with him the aura and grace of a theater sage; he has seen it all; he knows all the angles; his public adores him. He believes, I assume, he has earned the right to say whatever he wants. I was acting alongside him in a play and one evening I found myself smoking a cigarette while waiting to go onto stage. Smoking with me was a young actress of immense talent who should command respect from her co-actors (and does, for the most part.) The elderly actor “God” walked outside to continue his voice exercises. He nodded to us, looked my friend up and down and said, “If you stopped smoking, your tits would grow back.” I stood mouth agape, not knowing what to say. My friend was so embarrassed that it affected her performance and the comment certainly didn’t stop her from smoking. A few years earlier this “Christ-on-a-Cross” of the stage was acting alongside another friend of mine, and just before the two took to the stage, the old fucker turned to my friend (another very talented person. I know, I know, I’m so lucky…) and said, “My boy, you should be in musicals. You have no place in serious theater.” He said that. Just before the lights went up. And… nothing… happened. Both those stories are well known in the Cape Town theater industry and there are many more incidents attributed to this man. What enrages is me is that nothing happens when he says these awful things.

Shift your imagination, for a moment if you will, to an office environment or any working environment that isn’t inhabited by ineffectual artistic types. Let the aforementioned incidents play out within those environments and try to imagine some sort of violent act not being committed in response. You can’t, can you? Sure, you can say stupid shit to whomever you want, that is everyone’s inalienable right. God bless free, offensive speech. But there has to be an expected reaction. Generally, a well placed “Go fuck yourself” can ease all ills, but what if you inhabit a world where no one dares to say that? Where acceptance of severe insults (to your person or by means of lame artistic endeavors) is met with nothing more than a wide-eyed stare, a contemplative gaze into the abyss and perhaps a drunken rant to those who will listen, but not spread, your pain? What then? Could there be a way out of this? A path to enlightenment?

Yes. Punch the cocksucker in the face. He might think twice about opening his trap around you ever again.

We cannot function in a sub-genre society that is seemingly dedicated to artistic freedom and the right to voice opinions, but refuses to accept that a public rebuke to any statement, by a person or stated within a work of art, forms part of what makes an open-minded community work. My argument is not against the dumb-as-shit, talentless old fart who offended my friends with his words; my argument is against me and those of my ilk who did nothing to make him think about whether he should offend us or not. There are no consequences to what people say within the artistic community. The answer is not censorship, but debate. However, before a debate can begin, the revolution must be jump started by extreme acts that might cause debate to be a more acceptable consequence. The violent French Revolution was the reason the British revolution was a peaceful transition from monarchy rule to some sort of democratic republic (Dig that comparison, motherfuckers!)

This brings me back to the people returning from Grahamstown. Of course they are allowed to say whatever they want, but they must accept that there will be those who openly doubt their blind devotion to a festival that has done more damage than good in the world of theater. This is not negativity, but merely a refusal to see it your way. You don’t have to shut-up, but I will tell you to shut-up. That is my right. And if you feel offended, we can have a debate.

If you refuse to debate any form of artistic expression, or if you think your opinion is above any sort of debate, then you deserve to get punched in the face.

If your ego is driving your work and public persona, then you should get punched in the face.

If you think your work and opinion is a revolutionary act (and you’re not an armed, with weapons or intellect, revolutionary) then you should get punched in the face.

If you abuse those beneath you or those who are following in your footsteps, then you should get punched in the face.

If you use race or racism to excuse your shoddy work, you should get punched in the face.

And, fuck-it, I will say it: If you do anything half-arsed and promote it as being important, then you deserve to get punched in the face. (That goes for you Janice Honeyman, Pieter Toerien, Malcolm Purkey, Bobby Heaney, anyone who misdirects Maynardville and those who fuck things up for the rest of us.)

PS. Anyone who disagrees with what I’ve said, can debate me. If I don’t want to debate you, you can punch me in the face.

We need more rumble in this jungle.

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46 Responses to “Cold-Cocking As A Means of Progress (A Call To Arms)”

  1. guy de lancey July 14, 2011 at 16:01 #

    FUCKING EXCELLENT. GLOVES ON. TEETH OUT.

    • guy de lancey July 16, 2011 at 02:03 #

      Fuck you. You are too arrogant for Cape Town. Leave our coma alone.

  2. Adam July 14, 2011 at 19:17 #

    bottoms up.

  3. meganshead July 15, 2011 at 08:30 #

    Ooh, somebody didn’t go to the fucking festival this year, didn’t they?

    • Adam July 16, 2011 at 10:10 #

      I think you’ll find it was an Arts festival Megan, not a ‘fucking’ festival. But maybe your experience of it was different.

    • Uncle Loo July 16, 2011 at 15:10 #

      Megan (and your head)

      I don’t believe you entirely got the point of the article, but I do dig that you swore at me on the internet.

      Keep up the good work,

      Uncle Loo

  4. claire July 15, 2011 at 21:07 #

    i think you are the bloody arrogant ones! look at the people who have commented positively on this blog entry! possibly the rudest, most self absorbed theatre people in this country! Who the hell goes to a show, leaves early, and then returns DRUNK after the show to scream and shout about how bad it was!!!!! GUY DE LANCEY AND ADAM NEIL THATS WHO!!!
    what makes you think People give a damn about your opinion anyway?????? I believe i have just said what 100 other people havent had the BALLS to say!!!! YOU ARE NOT THE THEATRE GODS PEOPLE, FACE IT!!!!!
    And when you have stepped down off your high horses and you actually GREET people you have known for over 3 years! let me know coz I”ll be first in line!!!
    Oh and I am not going to use a PSEUDONYM because im not scared of saying what i think!!!!
    CLAIRE HILLS

    • guy de lancey July 15, 2011 at 23:17 #

      Hyperbole Claire. Hyperbole. No one screamed. No one shouted. It was direct. It was informed. `And it was articulate. And it was not Adam Neill. It was Sean Taylor. Warrick Grier. And Deborah Vieyra. Good for you for saying it. Am interested in the 100 other people without balls. We have a theatre culture of denial and mediocrity. We are sick of it. We don’t care whether anyone gives a damn about our opinions. At least we have them. Thanks for stepping up.

  5. claire July 15, 2011 at 22:14 #

    a

  6. claire July 15, 2011 at 22:26 #

    thats my 2 cents worth! let the debating begin!

  7. claire July 15, 2011 at 23:58 #

    Apologies adam!,perhaps 100 is an exaggeration, however there are and always will be people who are very quick to say things behind ones back! makes one wonder who ones friends are! We all have our opinions and I believe louis was calling people to voice them! I think what he has written is appauling! He who does so much theatre can slate people like that and louis don’t forget those are peoples family you are talking about! Fathers, husbands etc…

    • guy de lancey July 16, 2011 at 01:44 #

      Perhaps what the blog writer has written is an honest and frank response of frustration and particular insight into the way in which the theatre cottage industry turns, and the standards of practice it takes for granted, that consistently sideline really interesting and dangerous talent for the small comfortable clubs of mutual appreciation and comfortable ignorance that require facile agreement, fake politeness, venality, servile respect for imagined authority, collusion in commending rubbish that by it’s very nature, in existing through fiat and lying, excludes anything outspoken, articulate, educated, dissenting, passionate, insightful, outstanding, for the dull hum of mutually manufactured agreement in low standards of engagement. Perhaps he refuses to be snug and safe in his own sense of inferiority. Perhaps he really believes in lifting the veil.

  8. BeesKnees July 16, 2011 at 08:00 #

    I loved the read, please name and shame.

    That`s what we need more, arrogant over the hill c@nts, that end up filling some old, fat role on Isidingo or worse, Rythm city- yes you Jamie bartlett- who the fuck do we take you seriously after that!! Yes, you`re so fuckingggg awesomely talented- from his own mouth and into my ears. Oh Jamie you tower above the rest of the shit in your pool of mediocrity, I believe I owe you a blow-job, to suck some of your awesomeness into me!

    As for this other cogger you talk of Loo, who be he?

    I have a good idea, but would like to know if it is in fact he that rides the thunderbolt of amazingness!

    As for some of the reviewers in Cape Town, I believe some could do with a punch in the face. It seems any theatre in the shape of a turd deserves some polish and a place on the mantlepiece!

    The play entitled RelationfuckinShit, garnered amazing reviews. Really?? Clearly children`s theatre is the flavour of the day in Cape Town and anything involving adults will get a Fleur Du Cap nomination. But let`s leave them out for now as they can`t even spell the names right on the winner`s envelopes!!

    Name and shame the old fuck so when I see him in Cape Town I can bitchslap him, and save us from another Barker Haines or worse, a David Genaro!!!

    • Uncle Loo July 16, 2011 at 15:07 #

      Hey Bee’s Knees,

      Thanks for the blog-love. I love the bit about the blow-job.

      I don’t want to name the old codger in public, as who he is isn’t as important as what he represents, and also he’s related to a friend of mine (I can only rock the boat so much.)

      I hope you keep reading!!

      Uncle Loo.

  9. claire July 16, 2011 at 08:06 #

    These “well known stories” you speak of that are so terrible and soething should be done about things like this happening proves that you are not only arrogant but rediculously over senstive! Grow a backbone Louis! These things weren’t even said to you!

    Guy, if I am correctly understanding what you are going on about, the theatre the above mentioned create can’t be all that bad becase… Oh my…. They are actually making theatre happen, and successfully I’d like to add! If you are so bloddy good at what you do why don’t you put something on and give other the opportunity to slate you to pieces like you so frequently do to them!
    But its far safer to just watch other peoples work and slate it afterwards than actually put yourself on the line!

    Ergh arrogance, there’s no way to fight it, belcause you will always think you are wonderful and right even when you are not.

    • Adam July 16, 2011 at 10:08 #

      A post script for you Claire, as you too appear to be awake and invigorated by this conversation…
      I think you’ll find that Mr. De Lancey has indeed produced, put on, directed, performed in several productions in the town.
      Mr. Viljoen has similarly done so.
      To my recollection most if not all of those have been received with high merit and fiscal success. That merit has been accorded by not only friends and family but the self same critics to whom I suspect you give much credence. It is of note that Guy’s most recent production was almost whole heartedly shunned by his fellow producers of the so called ‘big houses’ of town. Fear leading to a lack of respect I’d hazard. Anyway. No matter, just helping with some facts of record.

    • guy de lancey July 16, 2011 at 10:23 #

      If you understand what I am ‘going on about’ you will understand that ‘making theatre happen’ is no measure of anything. And you may be judicious in using the word ‘successfully’. It is rather like saying ‘I went to the toilet, successfully’. But 7000 people liked it.

  10. Adam July 16, 2011 at 10:01 #

    Dear Claire,
    First off thank you for your apology. I do note that it was given without the capitalised vitriol of the accusation but that perhaps is the nature of contrition.
    I want to assure you that had I been there with Messrs de Lancey et al I too would have left at half time. Indeed when I saw the show the night previous it was only through professional obligation that I stayed the course. I regrettably will not see those hours again.
    I’m pleased that Louis’ rant has drawn your ire, bringing your emotions in re: theatre to the surface, as much as I agree whole heartedly with Guy’s later response but I fear that a call to the defence of kith and kin as a rebuff of theatre criticism is a weak one. I too have family and it would give me great pleasure to see my first born one day enter this potentially honourable craft. However that craft will not exist if the current status quo is maintained. Again I think Guy’s latest response applies.
    It is my responsibility, yours too, to use our intelligence to peer review our work. And it is our responsibility to demand the best work we think possible. That is not currently happening by-and-large. If this failure continues then I will be ashamed of the legacy that I leave for the future and too embarrassed to expose my family to the tawdry depths that are being plumbed.
    On a final note, this being after all a limited arena, to which gods do you refer in such capital terms? Who are your theatre gods? Why do you think that we seek to replace them? We are none of us gods, Claire, screaming or otherwise; but we can and we must strive to draw closer to the divinities of our craft; honesty, discipline, joy…
    Please feel free to re-introduce yourself next time you see me and we can continue to debate.
    Adam.

  11. claire July 16, 2011 at 10:34 #

    As I said “arrogance you can’t fight it you will always believe you are right and no one can be better than you and what you do and say is always right! I have no time for arrogance I’m affraid! You continue thinking you are great! I will comtinue thinking you are not! The biggest thing for me is that you still behave like you don’t even know me, Guy, you especially, when you have known for a bloody long time! But I understand no ne can be quite as amazing as you I’m 100% fine with that I will forever be beneath you and you don’t have to greet me! you continue walking around with your nose in the air because you ae more superior than any of us!

    Oh and lastly,Louis, who has nothing more to say apparently! When you next want to call someone the names you have in this blog perhaps do so to their face or at least on a medium where they can defend themselves I take all of what you said very personally as I happen to care grately for this person! If you have bones to pick pick away but to the persons face!

    • guy de lancey July 16, 2011 at 10:52 #

      Arrogance is very easy to fight. All one needs is a sense of humor and a dictionary.

  12. claire July 16, 2011 at 10:55 #

    Of which I have both thanks guy!

    • guy de lancey July 16, 2011 at 13:49 #

      Superb. Then we know that Loo can’t be serious. But can spell.

  13. Uncle Loo July 16, 2011 at 15:03 #

    Hello, fearsome fighters…

    First off, I apologize for joining the fray at such a late point. I have two excuses to offer up that may absolve me: #1 – My Samsung Omnia does not allow me to do too much commenting, and when I’m not near a Wi-Fi spot, I’m forced into Facebook updates and merely viewing the carnage on this blog from a distance (Damn you, Samsung Omnia. Someone should do a blog about you!) #2 – I did want to see where your discussion would lead, as I think it’s amazing that these things you’ve all desperately been wanting to say are finally being said.

    Claire, thanks for having the balls to speak up. I really do admire your passion and all insults to my person aside, I think you should’ve said these things a while ago if you felt so strongly about it. It is a pity you feel that you were somehow attacked by what I said in the article, and it was out of respect for you and Luke (who I gladly call my friends) that I didn’t name the person you’re defending in the blog. One needn’t love the father to love the son. I was using him as an example of the accepted class system within our community and things people get away with when they see themselves are more important than others. The fact that he made those statements to other people shouldn’t affect my repulsion to what he said and that I did nothing about it. If you read my blog again you will see that the argument is against “me an those of my ilk” for not doing anything about these abuses. You thinking I’m a dickhead for opening my mouth just reaffirms my argument that we’ve gotten so used to shutting up and taking it in the rear that to speak up, even among one’s friends, has become taboo.
    Don’t you feel better now that you’ve told Guy, Adam and me that you can’t stand us? And yet you’ve kept that to yourself for a while, and now finally it’s out in the open and you don’t have to fake it anymore. That’s exactly what I’m advocating. You felt they (and I suppose me) were acting as if you were somehow inferior and that made you furious. But now that you’ve let that out, you feel better and more affirmed (I hope).
    Do you disagree with the entire article? Do you think everything is perfect in this world we (you and I) love so dearly? Do you not think changes should happen in order to induce some sort of revolution?

    As much as I enjoyed the back and forth from Camp De Lancey/Neill to Camp Hills, I do think the point is being missed. It is because of the accepted way of doing things that the work suffers. I didn’t write a blog about people I don’t like (that would take too fucking long) but about those who make this industry more and more stale everyday and the work that suffers because of that state of being.

    That being said, thanks to Claire, Guy and Adam for making this my most successful and most interesting blog so far.

    PS. Check out BeesKnees’ comment about Jamie Bartlett. Wow.

    PPS. My apologies to Samsung Omnia users. You can come debate me. If I don’t want to debate you, you can punch me in the face.

  14. claire July 16, 2011 at 17:21 #

    Hey louis,
    Firstly lets clear something up I don’t dislike you, I think you’re pretty full on but that’s a part of who you are,
    I have always felt guy is extremely arrogant and thus never paid him too much attention don’t think I’ve ever said 2 words to him! If there is one thing I do not do I never pretend to like people I don’t!

    When it comes to slating my too be father in law, if you really took the time to get to know him you would understand he didn’t mean to cause harm by the things he said, in fact I am certain he would be devastated if he knew how much anger he has caused! I am seriously blown awa by the things you’ve said about him, and the names you’ve called him!! Those are very big accusations!very very big and very very hurtful and highly unnecessary!

    I strongly suggest you get to know him! You will discover he is a very loving, fun, palyful man! Who is highly successful just ook how long He has been in the industry that doesn’t come from not being great at your craft! Luke and I are very very very hurt by what you’ve said! I suggest you reread your blog and imagine that was your father someone was speaking about like that! Its unbelievably mean Louis and most certainly not true in anybodies eyes!!!

    I believe we can all say and feel what we want and now we have a medium in which we can share it! But don’t do it about someone who can’t defend themselves on that medium!!!

    Have your opinions, voice them but try make sure the person in question really is a Ltalentless” old codger” and a fucker? How dare you, before making such bold state$ents!!

    • guy de lancey July 17, 2011 at 09:16 #

      I have never said anything bad you ms Hills. But in your shrill reactionary ignorance what you don’t get is that I may be socially shy.

    • Cat July 17, 2011 at 09:18 #

      Ummm, Claire go back and read what u have said . 1)” I’ve always felt Guy was extremely arrogant and thus never paid him to much attention and don’t think I’ve ever said more than 2 words to him” 2 )” I strongly suggest you get to know him! You will discover he is a very loving, fun, playful man.”
      You admit u don’t know Guy well ( can’t be if u haven’t said 2 words to him) and yet u label him as arrogant. Later u shocked at the judgment that louis has made of someone you claim he doesn’t know. Ummm, not fair if u ask me.We all judge in the first few mins…we must to survive…and yes, we are often off the mark! But don’t ask someone to do what u are unwilling to do yourself.
      And to be sensitive to the fact that someone is a father, mother child etc… Please… That has no place in a debate…debating is not about pussy footing around the issues!

  15. claire July 16, 2011 at 20:17 #

    sorry that was supposed to read “never paid him too much attention don’t think I’ve ever said MORE THAN 2 words to him!”

  16. Mawenzi July 17, 2011 at 00:24 #

    What a pity all of this became so personal and subsequently so tedious – with all respect to anybody’s feelings. I do not have a clue who you guys are talking about but I love the fact there is a debate. Can we please carry on the debate that uncleloo started in the first place. Are we really so complacent that we do not have an opinion? Jobs are difficult to come by and we all want to be invited to the fabulous lunches but are all you guys too scared of the holy cows in the industry that nobody else is saying anything about the debate. Go for it. Be slapped in the face.

  17. Anonymous July 17, 2011 at 10:18 #

    Ummm, Claire go back and read what u have said . 1)” I’ve always felt Guy was extremely arrogant and thus never paid him to much attention and don’t think I’ve ever said more than 2 words to him” 2 )” I strongly suggest you get to know him! You will discover he is a very loving, fun, playful man.”
    You admit u don’t know Guy well ( can’t be if u haven’t said 2 words to him) and yet u label him as arrogant. Later u shocked at the judgment that louis has made of someone you claim he doesn’t know. Ummm, not fair if u ask me.We all judge in the first few mins…we must to survive…and yes, we are often off the mark! But don’t ask someone to do what u are unwilling to do yourself.
    And to be sensitive to the fact that someone is a father, mother child etc… Please… That has no place in a debate…debating is not about pussy footing around the issues!

    • Cat July 17, 2011 at 10:22 #

      Hey…. Why’d it say anonymous??? I put my name dammit. Cat… Catherine… Catherine Brown!

  18. claire July 17, 2011 at 22:34 #

    Hi Cat, you are correct complete double standards… However iwhen you spend 3 years or more in the same social group as someone you barely have to talk to them to understand what they are about!
    When someone still doesn’t even greet you after 3 years you can kinda figure out that they are a little arrogant!

    Guy, unfortunately, being socially shy, is absolutely no exvuse for disregarding ones presence I’m affraid! And I never once said you ever said anything horrrible about me! How nice you’ve got such a fan in Catherine, Guy.

  19. Anonymous July 17, 2011 at 22:52 #

    Oh beautiful and blinded Cape Town people, would you all shut up and stop with the childish rant. If you stopped crawling over each other like crabs in a boiling pot then maybe you could get your act together and Cape Town can be seen more than just a stage for Barbie & Ken. You all have something to offer but you will remain in a small town on a small stage if you resort to high school shenanigans.
    If you hate Cape Town then you should go to the stage where you dream. If your stage is in Cape Town then try giving your time to developing your talent rather than allocating your time to regressing into a bunch of howling buffoons.
    – The African Soul

    • clairehillsaire July 18, 2011 at 08:59 #

      WOOHOO!!!!

    • Anonymous July 18, 2011 at 13:20 #

      Actually “Anonymous”, the above is an online rehearsal workshop for the micro themes of King Lear. We have a Goneril. A Fool. Can’t wait for a Bastard son, a serious motherfucking Regan, and a defiant Oswald. You are looking damn fine as Cordelia. “And to be sensitive to the fact that someone is a father, mother child etc… Please”. Great stuff.

  20. Uncle Loo July 18, 2011 at 13:42 #

    Dear Battle-weary warriors,

    Are y’all about done?

    It’s a pity this became a forum to air personal grievances, but having said that I do think it’s a step in the right direction. Well done, you fast-typing, self-censorship scorning, flame tongued sonsofbitches.

    Perhaps a drink is in order. That goes for you too, “The African Soul”… whoever you may be. And all the other “Anonymous” participants as well.

  21. guy de lancey July 18, 2011 at 14:10 #

    That was me. Pretending to be Anonymous. To see how it felt. Can I cum twice?

  22. guy de lancey July 18, 2011 at 14:17 #

    “Men so disorder’d, so debosh’d and bold,
    That this our court, infected with their manners,
    shows like a riotous inn: epicurism and lust
    make it more like a tavern or brothel
    than a graced palace. The shame itself doth speak
    for instant remedy.” Goneril

  23. guy de lancey July 18, 2011 at 17:07 #

    Imagining the Maynardville selection committee

    I want to thank you all for coming. My name is Bryan. But you all know that. Your Project Ko-ordinator. As you know, we recalled the tender for King Lear. Michael felt after the wonderful success of last years comedy romp, thank you Roy, that we should stick to comedies. They are funnier. Frequency of the ‘romp’ word is up in the local critical arts press. And we know what that means. Also a dull politically correct version is planned by one of our “competitors” for next year. There is some sort of “hacktivist” dissenters group, but they are small, who contend that Lear may be Shakespeare’s darkest comedy. Unbelievable. I know. I use the inverted commas gesture often, but I need to make a point. No wonder it falls to us maintain stewardship of the Shakespearean heritage we are so proud of. I hope you don’t mind being called Stewards.

    Moving on. Last years Shrew was such a success, and by the way, we almost had two dissenters thrown out of the auditorium after the first act. So that’s something…um…good…

    (Chuckles in Approval limbo)

    Where was I? Oh Suc-cess. Yes. The cast ran around shouting and screaming dressed like circus-gimps, no clearly focused intent at all, no narrative development, we had young men in tights though this year, not bare-chested, not a single actor actually spoke to another, and the infinite variation in a single character Shakespeare gives us was pissed into the wind for simplistic cardboard versions of the same ones that existed in the directors head. Wonderful. Well done. That is what the public want. Our economic indicators make this clear. Not our sense of denial as some bitter cynics contend. The audience want to feel pillaged while laughing at highschool humor. Don’t believe otherwise.

    We do however seem to have developed a problem in perception vis a vis young-hip-and-new and need a long overdue image adjustment. We won’t be losing the cheap student armies and the cast pliancy factor here. I will still attend castings and voice my opinion. Anyone non-agreeable persons will be dis-engaged. This IS an artistic decision. Marthinus almost dropped the potato on Tony & Cleo.

    We now have other options. The one we are presenting has come up through the ranks and shown a remarkable capacity to be ignorant of management machinations in an attempt to advance his own career. I see that as initiative. He is Fresh, he is Happening, He is our chance to bat the ball out of the dressing room. One hundred and ten percent initiative. He is also, one of the Club. I know. I sense your relief. And, he has described his promotion as “one of the most sought-after directing assignments in South Africa.” Perhaps thats just his website jive. But we can save on helium treatment. He is definitely our man.

    This year it will be….Kung fu Comedy.

    Stunned? I was.

    A mind numbingly innovative idea. You’ll admit, a far cry from the camp Roman armies, Long sweeping coats of Hyland, Grammatically Compromised Soap Stars, Beach Wear by Basson, Actors trying to crawl out of a Directorial Hole and Rude Gestures for Rude Words style of acting of the past. Here we have a game changer. I mean, you do want to remain Chairpersons of the Committee of the Trust for the ‘Prestigious Annual Shakespeare Season’ to quote our protégé for some time into the future don’t you? I know I know, the play starts with an execution, but that does not need to set the tone. Follow the Romp.

    I believe we have made a bold choice, a wise choice and a choice that will reboot the public’s perception of Maynardville as a third rate high school drama camp with the same rotation of camp commanders that embarrass themselves by pedantically grinding on about Shakespearean voice technique and projection instead of paying attention to the story, into one of critical insight, cost contingent awe and wonder, and a sense of pride in their own capacity for intelligent engagement.

    Here’s hoping for a wonderful season at which new heights are scaled many rivers crossed, and I can’t seem to find, my way.

    Coffee machine in the foyer.

    • Adrian Galley August 10, 2011 at 14:41 #

      It seems you did cum twice Guy. I read this one before, somewhere. I love the image of camp commanders, I saw cammo-wedgie-shorts and jackboots. What was your proposal that got turned down then?

      • guy de lancey de lancey August 12, 2011 at 23:56 #

        The proposal was naked mud wrestling with the trust/selection committee, project management team, and a large south american anaconda species as a curtain raiser. Fuck it, make that the full 2 hr show! Seen the cammo-wedgie-shorts and jackboots!

  24. clairehills July 18, 2011 at 18:23 #

    drinks sounds marvellous Louis! on you i presume!
    perhaps we chould invite the “old codger” along!?

  25. Anonymous August 4, 2011 at 15:53 #

    you’ve got so many comments, it could be a play or a movie

  26. Diane Wilson August 20, 2011 at 11:52 #

    I would love comments from any of these people on any productions they have seen;anytime, anywhere that they consider WORTHY.That would make an interesting debate. Lets list the productions we thought were brilliant and why;if there ARE any of course. Constant bitterness gets boring after a while.

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